(I)mage
Posted: October 16, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: American Idol, Biggest Loser, blogging, Bob Harper, compassion, crossfit, cycling, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, happiness, health, Holley Mangold, hope, kettlebell, kindness, life, Lincoln, Lincoln Nebraska, love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, NBC, nebraska, Olympic weightlifting, Omaha, Omaha Nebraska, paleo, passion, perspective, pilates, running, trail running, walking, whole foods, WOD, writing, yoga 8 CommentsI am not an angel,” I asserted; “and I will not be one till I die: I will be myself-
Before we get started with the usual jibber-jabber a few important notes:
Two women I sincerely look up to and love are back in the news. Holley Mangold is on this seasons run of The Biggest Loser (whatever this is). Her passion, authenticity and spirit are simply beautiful and empowering! Long time readers keenly know I have been on the Team Mangold bandwagon for quite some time and I hope you hop on as well! Also in the news is my dearest friend Anne. Anne and her relay team consisting of some rather dashing and lovely young ladies took first place in the annual Market to Market relay between Omaha, Nebraska and Lincoln, Nebraska. I learn more from Anne than she will ever learn from me, brilliant performance!
… What follows is a draft I started yet never got around polishing up to post. What you read below is unedited, pouring out of my heart and thoughts concerning weight, sensuality and image. Taboo topics to so many …
A woman or man who is worried about their appearance will never be able to relax enough to let their true sensuality and spirit shine upon us.
If we are insistently worried about our tummy overhang and flabby arms, we become tense to the world. Far too many of us spend countless hours staring in a mirror and in our lovers arms on alert for reassurances from them, that they are indeed attractive enough to “us“.
If we look deeply enough in their eyes, in our own hearts we will indeed see that we really are: Beautiful and Sensual.
If we are ashamed of our shape, the damn number on a scale – We will be stilled. We will not feel entitled to being seen in public and between the sheets, we fade quietly into the background of not wanting to seek attention, never allowing our brilliance to shine.
Notes:
I loathe sharing self-serving advice, prefacing statements … Learn to feel and love your body, express your passion openly onto this beautiful world. Be the Lilly of the Night that opens its petals, openly defy the description(s) the world has placed on you – Shine.
(Auto) Porción
Posted: October 1, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: Abstinence, blogging, compassion, Crafts, cycling, exercise, fitness, food, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, health, hipster, hope, kettlebell, kindness, life, Lifestyle (sociology), love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, nutrition, Omaha, paleo, passion, perspective, pilates, running, Style, Support Groups, trail running, weight loss, whole foods, WOD, writing, yoga 4 CommentsLive to the point of tears-
Part of my philosophy here at CultFit is that I believe that people who engage in a healthy and active lifestyle and folks who don’t, can benefit from sharing stories with each other.
Quick example: If you’re struggling with injury, doubting yourself, stuck in a deep – treacherous training rut and wonder if it’s even possible to live a happy life without fretting over a tedious marathon training plan? It can be refreshing and helpful to hear from people who don’t train like a bunch of “freaks“. What do people do who merely run for fun? How do they relax the temptation to compete? On the other hand, if you don’t fancy running more than a meter, it can be affirming or simply a vicarious pleasure to hear the ups and downs of other people’s lives.
Exploring and surrendering to your own style can help you craft your own plan …
Notes:
When all is said and done, the most helpful thing we can do is ask ourselves: What makes me comfortable, given who I really am?
The (I)ntro
Posted: September 27, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: blogging, crossfit, cycling, Darth Vader, Emotion, exercise, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, health, hipster, hope, intensity, Jedi, kettlebell, kindness, life, love, Luke Skywalker, lululemon, marathon, medicine, meditation, motivation, Motrin, musings, natural, nature, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Omaha, pain, Pain management, paleo, passion, running, star wars, WOD, writing, yoga 28 CommentsPain will come with time, but time will heal the pain-
Let the above quote settle in your heart for a moment …
Life can be full of emotional “roles” we take on. I am tired of trying to act out what others have created – written for me, and I want to define myself for who I really am, not what’s expected.
Of the 500+ blog posts I have written, this one has been by far the most challenging. Why? Because it is more Uncle Ben Kenobi then Luke Skywalker and while I like to think I can save the day, every day, for everyone, like an intergalactic heroine; I realize I must now save myself. I am not a fictional character but a simple dude figuring things out and sharing observations along the way. A simple dude who is learning that being healthy and pain-free is not a luxury to take lightly, it is part of my journey.
I’ve arrived to the conclusion that I need more than awareness, I need acceptance in my life. I am fully aware that I live with unwavering pain everyday, simply waking up in the morning (hell, I never fall sleep) is enough of a reminder.
I fully realize now (in this uncomfortable writing position) that awareness is the crisp sheet of Star Wars wrapping paper my lovely wife and I firmly wrap around our son’s birthday presents, with the gift(s) neatly stowed inside, and acceptance is the shredded aftermath of his fury: ribbons, bows, poorly taped boxes, and batteries I forgot to pick up the night before (because focusing on suppressing pain is all-consuming) … it is effort, function, and truth beyond projected images. They are both beautiful and play important roles in our life.
Awareness: I have always wanted to get better after each injury, heal faster, be healthier, listen to everyone’s problems, and take away everyone’s pain away without ever taking time to acknowledge my own. I’m terrified of pain … I want to be the poetic ideal that everyone believes I am. A friend, a father and husband with time and heart for all who come in need of a hug or a willing ear, to process a conversation or opinion without judgement. I want to meditate peacefully, perform yoga pain-free, be a better lover, and be honest and open to all I meet. Is that too much to be all of the time?
The answer of course is a resounding YES! Because after years of simply being aware of the pain, I am now laid barre writing to you, fully accepting where I am at in life.
Acceptance: I have always thought that simply not being in the grasp of the worst of my pain was in fact happiness. Everything these past few years has been a matter of comparison for me, I am a walking barometer of pain. I want to know what happiness truly feels like. Happiness is not skipping mega doses of pain medication(s) one morning in order to know I am alive today in comparison to yesterday when I was under the influence of too much Motrin. My days are filled sharing with others in hopes that they will come to know happiness. That they can work towards being better, that you are allowed to eat red velvet birthday cake, drink too much wine and be merry. You don’t have to suppress the joys of life to achieve some self-serving, vanity filled fitness goal! What others expect you to be …
Notes:
What follows is a note to myself:
I must take care of myself, not just so I can fulfill my obligations in life but to take care of those who love me.
Flaw(ed)
Posted: September 25, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: Agape, Aristotle, biking, Bikram Yoga, blogging, compassion, cycling, Eros, fitness, freshly pressed, gluten free, happiness, health, hipster, kettlebell, kindness, life, love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, Omaha, Oscar Wilde, paleo, passion, perspective, Philautia, Philia, pilates, Romance, running, Self-love, simplicity, trail running, Walk, walking, whole foods, WOD, writing, yoga 10 CommentsThis thing about you that you think is your flaw – it’s the reason I’m falling in love with you-
Oscar Wilde once wrote that, “The essence of romance is uncertainty.” Why yes! The age-old strategy for finding love Is by playing hard-to-get, which helps spur yearning, desire and anticipation. Although there are other kinds of “love” and at times its confusing for many (especially myself) because unlike the great word smiths, writers and poets before our time. Today, love is a catchall term for literally, everything. Love carries little or no weight during a conversation, how many times have you said you Love running in the same sentence with: “I Love you.”
Join me by reintroducing other, seldom used terms or endearment back into the lexicon of the modern world. *Bonus points if you use these words with a loved one, stranger and whist working out today.*
Ludus, is a more playful form of affection found in fooling around and flirting. If you feel love for all “things“, humanity, nature, the stinky dude bent over in front of you in yoga class this morning? A more generalized love is Agape.
Philia, is deep, non-sexual intimacy between close friends, family and often at times – complete strangers. Philia can also manifest as a deep bond forged by people who have been through a dramatic or emotional experience together. Can you remember the kind folks who helped support you through your first marathon?
Lastly I want to leave you with the most profound kind of love … In order to love another I believe we also need a type of love called Philautia, which is self-love. It’s important to note that in order to care for others, we desperately need to care and love ourselves.
Notes:
Love is not something we fleetingly fall into. Be well today!
Morning Classic(s)
Posted: August 28, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: bikramyoga, blogging, crossfit, exercise, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, Hatha yoga, health, hipster, hope, intensity, kettlebell, kindness, life, love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, Omaha, passion, perspective, pilates, Poetry, Religion and Spirituality, running, whole foods, WOD, yoga 11 CommentsIt takes courage to grow up and become who you really are-
As a little dude, I grew up doing what I was supposed to do (this is my side of the story), when I was supposed to do it, following a largely unconscious – persistent script about what it meant to live one’s life. Not just play but excel at sports, go to school and become edumacated, start a rewarding and vibrant career, get married to the woman of my dreams (this happened) and have a few kid(s) for good measure…
As a self-described “athlete“, I did a lot of running, picking up heavy things and moving them around, competing at all costs, ignoring injuries, bragging about results, sticking within the status quo like many of the blogs we will read today … However a string of serious injuries in my mid 30’s made me rethink everything I had thought about both competing and what I was doing with my life more broadly.
At the same time I had discovered seva, karma yoga, mindfulness, rediscovered my love for cycling and enjoying nature. As I began to play – not compete outdoors, my friends and family would often say “let’s ride here, swing a kettlebell if we like or maybe a spot of yoga?” and most importantly: Smile, Laugh and have Fun. And that’s all I’d want.
Being authentic hasn’t come easily to me, and I’m still working on it, although it’s changed how I think about this inspiring world we call home.
Notes:
Being open to new paths, new ways of doing things, formulating new perspectives, creating your own melodies: these are the “things” that life has truly taught me, and continue(s) to teach me to this wonderful day.
CultFit 