Outside the (Box)
Posted: January 31, 2014 Filed under: Meditation, Yoga | Tags: Abuse, blogging, compassion, cycling, exercise, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, health, hipster, hope, intensity, kindness, life, love, lululemon, marathon, Maturity, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, Omaha, passion, perspective, pilates, Power Yoga, Reality, recovery, relationships, running, self, simplicity, trail running, whole foods, yoga 6 CommentsA man must consider what a rich realm he abdicates when he becomes a conformist-
What is the impact of our aggressive – abusive mindset on ourselves and on our lives?
We often hear and read about our “carbon” footprints–the impact of our consumption on good ol’ mother earth. Interestingly, to trace our aggressive – abusive footprint, we might examine the consequences of our aggressive – abusive choices, whether seemingly casual or conscious.
Initial aggressive – abusive encounters set a pattern, a pattern many people consciously choose to ignore. Understanding and healing damaging formative experiences that were once stepping-stones in our development is imperative, because sometimes those stepping-stones petrify into the expected path, and I have walked this path for far too long.
An aggressive – abusive mindset is difficult to perceive, standing in front of a bathroom mirror, taking a picture of ourselves – how “ripped” and “toned” we are. We, we are so immersed in our own experience that it simply appears as reality. Imagine what the world would be like if Facebook – Social media were indeed, Reality?!?
…
A mature relationship with yourself involves an intensely intimate audience … With only one other person – You.
Why do we choose to ignore the depth of our loving self, tuning out the myriad of feelings as they occur? For far too long I choose to engage in a dishonest, shameful and aggressive – abusive relationship with myself.
The footprints on my destined path … I feel, are changing.
Daily Meditation:
I’m not too keen on making promises, to promise is to heavily load a burden upon your shoulders … All I ask of you, is to take care yourself, for yourself, and weave these thoughts into your daily life. What are you waiting for …
(Con)Fidence
Posted: November 18, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout, Yoga | Tags: Belize, blogging, compassion, exercise, family, fitness, flow, free range, freshly pressed, friends, fun, gluten free, happiness, health, hope, intensity, life, love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, Omaha, paleo, passion, perspective, pilates, recovery, running, trail running, whole foods, writing, yoga 12 CommentsConfidence is ignorance. If you’re feeling cocky, it’s because there’s something you don’t know-
After many years of “coaching” and helping other cool and inspiring folks, I am often struck by their relationship with fun. When we first meet, they often talk at great length about training plans, intensity, goals, effort and lastly they mention: “this needs to be fun.”
I have a problem with Fun.
Fun (when used above), conveys a sense of a trivial and purposeless living. Fun … Is hedonistic. My definition of fun does not seem to sit right with many people who are engaged in uber-competitive activities and have a competitive mindset. There is no magical switch you can flip, then manage to stumble into a yoga studio one afternoon to “center” yourself. Fun is a lazy vacation, sipping mojito’s on a white sand beach in Belize, not an early morning wind sprint session and killing the weights before bed.
Should we abandon the idea of “fun” all together? Nope, I just ask that you think about “fun” in a different light, a different Sense …
Daily Meditation:
All aspects of our lives ought to be enjoyable, interesting word(s): Enjoyable, Enjoyment, Enjoy.
My definition of fun? Is “enjoyment.”
The (I)ntro
Posted: September 27, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: blogging, crossfit, cycling, Darth Vader, Emotion, exercise, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, health, hipster, hope, intensity, Jedi, kettlebell, kindness, life, love, Luke Skywalker, lululemon, marathon, medicine, meditation, motivation, Motrin, musings, natural, nature, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Omaha, pain, Pain management, paleo, passion, running, star wars, WOD, writing, yoga 28 CommentsPain will come with time, but time will heal the pain-
Let the above quote settle in your heart for a moment …
Life can be full of emotional “roles” we take on. I am tired of trying to act out what others have created – written for me, and I want to define myself for who I really am, not what’s expected.
Of the 500+ blog posts I have written, this one has been by far the most challenging. Why? Because it is more Uncle Ben Kenobi then Luke Skywalker and while I like to think I can save the day, every day, for everyone, like an intergalactic heroine; I realize I must now save myself. I am not a fictional character but a simple dude figuring things out and sharing observations along the way. A simple dude who is learning that being healthy and pain-free is not a luxury to take lightly, it is part of my journey.
I’ve arrived to the conclusion that I need more than awareness, I need acceptance in my life. I am fully aware that I live with unwavering pain everyday, simply waking up in the morning (hell, I never fall sleep) is enough of a reminder.
I fully realize now (in this uncomfortable writing position) that awareness is the crisp sheet of Star Wars wrapping paper my lovely wife and I firmly wrap around our son’s birthday presents, with the gift(s) neatly stowed inside, and acceptance is the shredded aftermath of his fury: ribbons, bows, poorly taped boxes, and batteries I forgot to pick up the night before (because focusing on suppressing pain is all-consuming) … it is effort, function, and truth beyond projected images. They are both beautiful and play important roles in our life.
Awareness: I have always wanted to get better after each injury, heal faster, be healthier, listen to everyone’s problems, and take away everyone’s pain away without ever taking time to acknowledge my own. I’m terrified of pain … I want to be the poetic ideal that everyone believes I am. A friend, a father and husband with time and heart for all who come in need of a hug or a willing ear, to process a conversation or opinion without judgement. I want to meditate peacefully, perform yoga pain-free, be a better lover, and be honest and open to all I meet. Is that too much to be all of the time?
The answer of course is a resounding YES! Because after years of simply being aware of the pain, I am now laid barre writing to you, fully accepting where I am at in life.
Acceptance: I have always thought that simply not being in the grasp of the worst of my pain was in fact happiness. Everything these past few years has been a matter of comparison for me, I am a walking barometer of pain. I want to know what happiness truly feels like. Happiness is not skipping mega doses of pain medication(s) one morning in order to know I am alive today in comparison to yesterday when I was under the influence of too much Motrin. My days are filled sharing with others in hopes that they will come to know happiness. That they can work towards being better, that you are allowed to eat red velvet birthday cake, drink too much wine and be merry. You don’t have to suppress the joys of life to achieve some self-serving, vanity filled fitness goal! What others expect you to be …
Notes:
What follows is a note to myself:
I must take care of myself, not just so I can fulfill my obligations in life but to take care of those who love me.
Morning Classic(s)
Posted: August 28, 2013 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: bikramyoga, blogging, crossfit, exercise, family, fitness, free range, freshly pressed, friends, gluten free, happiness, Hatha yoga, health, hipster, hope, intensity, kettlebell, kindness, life, love, lululemon, marathon, meditation, motivation, musings, natural, nature, Omaha, passion, perspective, pilates, Poetry, Religion and Spirituality, running, whole foods, WOD, yoga 11 CommentsIt takes courage to grow up and become who you really are-
As a little dude, I grew up doing what I was supposed to do (this is my side of the story), when I was supposed to do it, following a largely unconscious – persistent script about what it meant to live one’s life. Not just play but excel at sports, go to school and become edumacated, start a rewarding and vibrant career, get married to the woman of my dreams (this happened) and have a few kid(s) for good measure…
As a self-described “athlete“, I did a lot of running, picking up heavy things and moving them around, competing at all costs, ignoring injuries, bragging about results, sticking within the status quo like many of the blogs we will read today … However a string of serious injuries in my mid 30’s made me rethink everything I had thought about both competing and what I was doing with my life more broadly.
At the same time I had discovered seva, karma yoga, mindfulness, rediscovered my love for cycling and enjoying nature. As I began to play – not compete outdoors, my friends and family would often say “let’s ride here, swing a kettlebell if we like or maybe a spot of yoga?” and most importantly: Smile, Laugh and have Fun. And that’s all I’d want.
Being authentic hasn’t come easily to me, and I’m still working on it, although it’s changed how I think about this inspiring world we call home.
Notes:
Being open to new paths, new ways of doing things, formulating new perspectives, creating your own melodies: these are the “things” that life has truly taught me, and continue(s) to teach me to this wonderful day.