Monday 6 February 2012
Posted: February 6, 2012 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: advice, cycling, fat, fitness, health, motivation, running Super Bowl, ugly 3 CommentsTechnology is a way of organizing the universe so that man doesn’t have to experience it-
Today’s sign of the Apocalypse: Yoga for self-absorbed travelers
Here at CultFit HQ we are rising up in the defense of individuals who want to live their lives without encountering mind cluttering advice during the day.
“We” and using the term loosely (due to the fact we have identified ourselves as part of the problem as well) firmly believe that magazines such as Mens Health et al (throw all closely related examples under the bus) are a cancer, literally to society.
Living and lurking on this side of the internet has taught us one important lesson: ‘Mericans whore out more advice during a 24 hour period than Uncle Sebastian’s Grandma did during the 104 years of her splendid life.
Seriously do we need to take such advice like this following example as gospel? ctrl+v from Mens Health
“When South Korean researchers exposed a group of human liver cells to asparagus extract, it suppressed free radicals and more than doubled the activity of two enzymes that metabolize alcohol.”
Looks like we will be serving asparagus at the next CultFit HQ blow out to prevent hangovers?
On the count of three everyone…let’s pull our collective heads out of our asses and go “LIVE” life instead of advising others to live theirs like we would like them to! Problem with that? Feel free to comment!?!
The Plan-
The future here at CultFit HQ.
The Workout-
From our “Proceed with caution” series…Not for time:
Warm up as you see fit (break a sweat without over exerting yourself – it can be done)
150 Perfect Push Ups and 45 Perfect Dead Hang Pull Ups in this order:
Hinge Walk Out High Push Up Plank – 10 Push Ups (walk back to standing) Gracefully extend into:
3 Perfect Dead Hang Pull Ups (nice even pulls)
Rinse and Repeat 15 times
There are two types of individuals who will do this today. One is the smart peep who finds rhythm, flow and balance to finish. The other one is the cat above.
Notes:
Do we have any advice to share with you today? Not really, stay healthy and ENJOY!?!
Friday 3 February 2012
Posted: February 3, 2012 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: crossfit, fitness, free good hippie porn, free range, girl scouts, health, hippie porn, motivation, pilates, running, yoga 3 CommentsYou cannot step twice into the same river, for other waters are continually flowing on-
Yet another long week is coming to an end and who’s to say we didn’t have an awesome one at that? We do everything around here for a reason and contrary to some of the bloviated emails we receive daily, not everyday in the gym is all out global thermal nuclear war! As we age and time goes on we step back to realize that “You know what?” “Just because everyone else is doing it doesn’t necessarily mean that we need to do it.” We could write for the next ten months giving specific examples and spoon feed it to you with care, gently just like your are used to in your daily life. Not here, not today never at CultFit HQ- Dear reader: You are smarter than that.
The Plan-
What we are hinting at today is not the lack of willpower. That excuse is to easy to use: “Hey bitch get out-o-my face!” “The little terrorist Girl Scout said I need to eat all of these caramel delights right now, so suck it!” That’s easy, way to easy and we use it all the time (insert your own excuse right now).
Although, some of you peeps will use willpower to force yourselves to directly engage in a dangerous behavior, even when you dislike what you are doing. All of this is done you claim for the sake of acceptance. Because we are perpetual smart-asses around here and Uncle Mo likes to shout out in meetings: “Yeah, like the yoga mom/pant militia!” “Or anyone who does X-Fit to get better at yoga/pilates?” Those are some examples. You could also throw diet in as well or pretty much anything else in your daily life.
So on that note dear reader…Carry on clicking the like button after reading two sentences. Continue to run too many miles in a week. Go to your yoga class for vanity and selfish reasons (yeah that’s you isn’t it?). Let everyone know you love apple pie via twitter and most importantly: Keep doing what you are doing for acceptance?!?
The Workout-
Warm Up as you feel like and:
For about an hour or so. Followed by:
200 Perfect Push Ups
200 Goblet Squats
200 Perfect Swings
200 Reverse Lunges
200 One Arm Presses (100 each arm)
And because you have no willpower- Once you pick up the weight off the floor, it stays up!
Notes:
Hand count class?!? How many of you feel like your current program is depicted in the image below? That’s kinda what we thought, it’s fine little buddies. Rest up this weekend enjoy the Rugby game on Sunday and prepare to get after it next week, ENJOY!!!
Thursday 2 February 2012
Posted: February 2, 2012 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: fitness, health, hippie porn, motivation, perspective, rest 1 CommentThe first step in the acquisition of wisdom is silence, the second listening, the third memory, the fourth practice, the fifth teaching others-
Time to shake things up fellow peeps. “Do you sense that?” Yeah things have been a bit copastetic around here to begin the year. Nice and cool, marinating in the sauce of life…
Maybe it’s time for a change of perspective? Keep doing what you had planned today as we move our chair over here just a little bit. There’s more light and honestly; it smells a lot better.
The Plan-
Oh don’t mind us, seriously take your time doing your social media thing. You may want to charge up the battery before you head out the door?
Just one quick question as we ease into the day. Hopefully you don’t mind? When will you step out of the box you are in?
The Workout-
Rest Day
It may be too late for some of you so if you like keep this in your back pocket for another day?
Before dawn find a quite spot and just chill enjoying the sight of the Sun rising above the horizon…”Hey jack ass get moving you are holding up the traffic here. I’m late for my 6:30am yoga class!”
Notes:
Relax, refresh and most importantly, ENJOY!!!
Wednesday 1 February 2012
Posted: February 1, 2012 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: courage, fitness, grace, handstand, health, living, motivation, perspective, push up, running, yoga 1 CommentThe price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knowledge of its ugly side-
Alright get ready for this one albóndigas! According to our Research and Admin Department here at CultFit HQ, 50.1% of our readers are of the female persuasion. “So what does that mean?” Nothing really although if we had to take bets on who opines the most today we highly recommend you take the over on the chicas at 20 emails…
Given the capricious ways of the female species let’s start with a picture to get things really fired up around here:
You don't say?
Now hmm hmm…we’re down here guys, don’t worry she isn’t going anywhere.
Bad news girls, you didn’t wake up like this and if you did you know how hard it is to stay in such peak condition…(topic for another day). Instead, and guys listen up closely as well: Try to roll out of bed being mindful of who you are and not what you wish to be?
Research has proven that the first few things you do upon waking is:
- Update your Facebook status
- Tweet you are running late for work after ignoring the alarm on your iPhone thingy
- Press the remote start on your car
Women and Men of the inter-webz please listen up! Like it or not you place an infinite amount of undue stress on your body worrying about the chic in the picture above. Stress we can live without. Awhile back we wrote about the topic of stressing over stress (Goggle it), Instead of torturing you again here is a link from a reputable spot so check it out: READ UP
The Plan-
The Workout-
Now that you have become aware of a few things let’s take a moment to expose a few glaring holes in your program…
30 Second Hand Stand Hold- No walls, no support, no flopping around (if you can’t make it this far…) followed by:
30 Hinge Perfect Push Ups (hinge once walk out and then 30 push ups)
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
25 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
20 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
15 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
10 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
5 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
30 Second Hand Stand Hold
1 Hinge Perfect Push Ups
Not that time ever really matters around here at CultFit HQ. Having said that if you struggle to do this in under 15 minutes or so or can’t do a Hand Stand without the aid of a wall? Pull up another workout from “That Site” and feel free to comment on how it worked out for you?!?
Notes:
Grace, flow, stillness and a heavy breathe all reside in the program above. Look within yourself and find the courage and confidence to take on the challenge today. Life is not easy nor is a workout pulled from some random blog-o-sphere site as easy as it seems, ENJOY!!!
Tuesday 31 January 2012
Posted: January 31, 2012 Filed under: Random Workout | Tags: biking, fitness, health, inversions, motivation, perspective, planks, push ups, running Leave a commentIf you believe everything you read, better not read-
Today’s sign of the apocalypse:
Stay classy dear friends…
We have been asked numerous times in the past to provide some sort of evidence that there really is a CultFit HQ. So to quell all the lurkers…
The Plan-
We get asked all sorts of questions around here from day-to-day. A classic example of one: “Like yo bro’s I have tried all the programs out there on the inter-webz and nothing seems to work?”
The answer is surprisingly simple and we have secretly been throwing it towards you since our first post some time ago: Walking and Meditation – Simplicity in form and function.
On any given day Uncle Pliny is working away on the Amiga scanning email, finally he has reported back with something tangible: Only .98% of our readers are truly exceptional and gifted athletes (re-read that again aloud pretty please).
To put it nicely for all the fragile types reading this morning sipping on a horrid tasting VitaCoCo (dare we say the Stella Artois of coconut waters?) You are hopelessly addicted to a failed fitness/health relationship. We need to look deep whiten ourselves and become aware of the decisions we make in regards to fitness and health. Only when we are completely comfortable with ourselves will we be able to put a foot forward in good faith to a better lifestyle.
The Workout-
This workout was provided by a dear friend of ours, Sister Harriet. No she didn’t take from that Pinterest site thingy (we hope):
Warm-Up any way you see fit followed by:
In this order- Planks-Inversions-Perfect Push Ups-Goblet Squats-Reverse Lunges (we know, dear reader you are creative so…this is what we did here at CultFit HQ)
Hinge walk Out High Plank Hold for 45 Seconds (walk back to hinge)
Ease into a Hand Stand Hold for 45 Seconds (tippy toes do not like your hands – gently pull them as far apart as possible) with GRACE come back to standing (feet together remember?)
Hinge Walk Out High Plank Hold – 10 Perfect Push Ups (walk Hands Back to standing)
25 Goblet Squats (oh, you did remember to bring some weight?)
25 Reverse Lunges (weight at heart center)
Rinse and Repeat about 10 times or so…If you peeps out there have a fave program that you would like to share that is not from Pinterest please send it in!
Notes:
Be safe today and most importantly, ENJOY!!!
CultFit 