Grinnin’ On Your Face

There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire. The other is to gain it-

The best chance of finding pure joy in your “activity” of choice, is to approach it out of desire, not emotional need (I’m writing broadly this morning).

“Do I need to go running today” or “Do I really want to ride 100+ miles of Gravel on a long holiday weekend?”

An emotional need to do “something” is a preference that you’ve decided must be gratified to remain whole and centered, that is to say a little bit differently, you can’t be well or feel whole without it. If I feel it, therefore, I need it, and if I need it, I have to feel it more This is a quick and efficient method to getting hurt, injured and falling out of love.

Daily Meditation:

Following our deepest desires (mine happens to be Gravel Grinding and Yoga) will lead you to a relationship based on compassion and kindness, rather than temporary excitement and dare I say – Injury. “I want to go for a nice ride,” is far more compassionate than, “I need to go for a ride.”

Play around with these last two statements before heading our the door this morning, and do take care!

* Thank you Scott for sharing some of your awesome pics from the Good Life Gravel Fondo this past Saturday!


13 Comments on “Grinnin’ On Your Face”

  1. “I want to go for a nice ride,” is far more compassionate than, “I need to go for a ride.”
    Precision of words really is everything. 🙂 I was just telling my husband yesterday that I am really longing for bike adventures! These pictures satisfied my craving in a sense 😉 have a wonderful week!

    • CultFit says:

      Awhile back I wrote a bit about inner dialog and how we treat ourselves when alone … Most of it was geared towards athletes and working out. All of it flew over my readers heads at the time. I had a lot of time on the bike this weekend, spinning along, time to contemplate and think – Let’s play with the wording a bit more: “I want to love and care for my body” or “I need to care for my body” … The difference is subtle yet profound, I only wish more folks would take the time to pause and listen to their bodies and what motivates them. Anyways! I’m glad you enjoyed the pictures my buddy Scott took out and about in the beautiful countryside in Nebraska. 🙂

  2. gamanrad says:

    I stood by the fire at the end of a long day writing yesterday and for about an hour, moaned that I ‘had’ to go for a run. I dragged myself out and pounded along. I did feel much, much better afterwards but I will try it your way next time. I wonder if this would link up nicely with the Tonglen practice – breathing in the violence of our perceived needs, and breathing out compassion…

    • CultFit says:

      You bring up an interesting question, quite profound actually. I’m genuinely interested in how this slight play on words works out for you the next time you gently go for an inspiring run.:)
      Be inspired today and please take care!

  3. bgddyjim says:

    I’ll throw a monkey wrench in the gears… I am truly my happiest around 22 mph in a big group, 20 in a small 5 man group. However, to ride that fast enjoyably, I have to train much harder and faster… Therefore, while I may rather go for an easy ride, sometimes daddy’s just gotta buck up and train hard so I can enjoy those long rides. Make sense?

    • CultFit says:

      Totally makes sense, although we can adjust the “training barometer” when we discuss training and intensity. If you spent all winter stuck on the couch (which your didn’t) than one day decided to hit it hard out on the road?!? There is an adjustment period, a subtle groove to fall into before you ramp up the intensity. Its the whole – Want or Need – question. You enjoy riding and are willing to put the work in order to achieve your goals – you totally want to get out there on the open road! I don’t fancy you to be the type of dude who “needs” to do much to get the most out of life.
      A really broad and wide ranging topic for sure, take care today!

      • bgddyjim says:

        You do make a fantastic point there brother… Heck, even spending all winter on the trainer an hour a day and it takes me a month just to get my road legs back.

  4. michelle says:

    Want vs. need…yes! Great post!

  5. […] up fighting for something that should be naturally easy, can be enormously relieving. I went from wanting to run marathons and ultra events to needing them … Comforting the tenderest of heartache […]

  6. Earth Angel says:

    Thank you for this post…as I have shifted into my physical world.. being a reflection of my mental spiritual and emotional reflections…remembering that i am always in balance..when my ego history kicks in.. I can go into overdrive…and ouch..( been known to work out for 3 hours) less often these days…thanks for finding my blog as well Heart to Heart Robyn

    • CultFit says:

      I hope you are having an amazing weekend! Thank you so much for stopping over to take a look around – Be well and please take care. 🙂

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